This is just rambling........There is a discussion in progress on a close friend's blog about racism in the north and the south.  I have not gotten involved but I like that there is at least a discussion going on. 

So far the discussion has not degenerated into name calling and other idiocies. That's a plus.  Still I do not join in.  Too hard.  It's all just too hard for me.  I am sure that it is the case for many, so like me they steer clear of offering their two cents for fear they may get caught up in some past pain.

I have a love hate relationship with the South.  For me  the South is beautiful and ugly all at once.  I learned to lead a double life here in Dixie.  Me and my best-friend attended  high school in Texas, in the 4th largest city in the country.  That high school's mascot was a confederate soldier, the school flag was a confederate flag, the school's football fight  song was Dixie. Tradition. 

I started the ninth grade in 1986, this school was 90% white,as was my first boyfriend and a vast majority of my love interests since.  I was not.  That first year was the worst year of my life in High school, I joined the band in order to blend as well as I could.  Hazing, name calling, bullying....all just adolescent hijinks, no big deal.  It was a big deal for me. Tradition.  "Hello my name is" stickers were stuck to the t-shirts of the freshmen, "fresh-fish" on some shirts. Not mine. "Invisible" on others. Mine.  Less than a dozen of us were invisible-We dozen had one thing in common.....guess. Tradition.

I lived in New York, Connecticut (briefly), New Mexico (briefly), Mississippi (spent a good bit of my formative years here. I spent summers here after I began school in Texas.  before that I lived in my tiny rural Mississippi town happy and oblivious), and now Texas( where all of my schooling took place and life's education really began).  I always miss the south, Texas in particular.  I always come back. Home.

I have difficulty discussing issues involving race because it's so very emotional for Everyone.  I, like many people learned a lot of "rules" about race the hard way and that clouds the judgement when true discourse is in order. 

In my life I have noticed/observed/endured racism in almost every endeavor I have undertaken, from attending university, dating and relationships(which is where I have gotten the most grief, "stick to your own" some say. "fuck'em" I say)  to my conversion to an earth religion more than 10 years ago.

Everything is so cloudy, yet everything is so clear.  Be good to one another, love completely and sincerely.  Otherwise we are doomed to live a homogenous life devoid of diversity, variety and social benefits. 

We need a new Tradition. I'm in.

That's all, this entry was not an endorsement nor an attack.  It just is. Like Me.